PPC a la Chii - Track 6

I’m Chihiro Natsuyaki, your Panda Ambassador! I know a loooot about pandas, so throw any questions my way, ‘kay?

Chii-kun! I came all the way to see you! Can you take a picture with the two of us?

I-If it’s okay, I wanna take another picture with Taotao with us too. Just like last time, with both of us in the middle…!

You came allll the way to Shirahama for us? And totally! Taotaooo, let’s snap a pic over here!

Oh, thank you for coming. Are you fine being sandwiched between us?

Uwaaaah, symme pair so cuuuute~!

The distance between Chii and Taotao in this shot… I’m literally going to staple this pic to my eyelids…

Oop, I got a phone call. It might be related to work, so I’ll catch you later! It was suuuuuper hype meeting you guys!

Kyaaah! It was hype meeting you tooooo!

Hello? Big sis?

≪Oh, Chii-chan? So it looks like I’ll be able to get there on schedule the day after tomorrow with my fiancé, Momoka, and Towa.≫

That’s great! The weather doesn’t seem bad either, so be careful on your way.

Umm… Is mom not coming with you guys? I thought her ticket was on the same flight.

≪It’s a little touchy, but before following through with your plans… I thought it’d be best to properly introduce my fiancé to her.≫

≪I took him back to Mom’s place. But just like I expected, it was a nonstop parade of harsh words, and I couldn’t endure it, so we ended up in a fight…≫

……!

≪…Sorry, Chii-chan. I didn’t care what she said about me, but I just couldn’t stand hearing anything that belittled him.≫

Y-Yeah. You have every right to be angry.

(Even though I wasn’t there, I can pretty much imagine how mom acted…)

Um… Is your fiancé okay?

≪He knows about our situation, so he’s fine. But I just feel bad he had to go through all that.≫

I thought so…

≪Mom got upset, so she said she’s not coming early. But she agreed to be there for the wedding photos, so I went ahead and changed her flight.≫

Mhm, got it. Thanks, Big Sis…

(Looks like our first and last family vacation won’t happen after all… Even though I wanted mom to enjoy it too…)

(No, I’ll make Sis worried if I get all gloomy!)

The beach is super beautiful even if it’s just for the day! I went alllll out and decorated it all romantically! Mom loves flashy stuff, so maybe she’ll enjoy that part at least!

≪Hm, you’re probably at work… so I’ll send you another PeChat before we take off.≫

(I originally just wanted Mom and Big Sis to get along, but did I make things worse…?)

(Maybe everything I’m doing is completely pointless… Maybe I really can’t make anyone happy.)

(If that’s true, then why am I even here? If I can’t make anyone smile, then what am I even…)

The ocean at night’s a bit scary… Even though it was so pretty during the daytime…

(I left the hotel because I couldn’t sleep. The inside of my head is a mess…)

(Where did I go wrong… If I had passed that audition… If I hadn’t gotten arrested… Would Mom have smiled then?)

(Once Big Sis gets married, she’s not coming back home, right? Because if all she does when she gets home is fight with Mom, coming back would just hurt.)

My dream of buying a big house and living with everyone… It’s definitely not possible now…

……

Oh, Chihiro. Are you scouting locations for the wedding photoshoot? It’s commendable how enthusiastic you are.

…! Raitin…?

Why are you here? It’s so late.

Ahaha. Actually…

The moon is beautiful tonight. So…

Will you have ramen with me?

……

Pffft…! Are you asking me out for ramen like it’s a proposal? That’s sooo cheating!

I parked the motorcycle I rented over there. Let’s hurry before the others notice we’re gone.

I thought Nayuuki had locked you out of the room or something. Turns out you just snuck out to get ramen, huh?

Thankfully, he was merciful enough to let me sleep in the same room. That did make getting out harder, however. That’s why I’m here so late.

Well yeah, an idol eating ramen in the middle of the night? Nayuuki would be suuuuper duper mad.

But I simply can’t visit Wakayama without eating Wakayama ramen. Now that I’m here, I won’t be able to keep up with our walks unless I eat it every night.

Raitiiin… Don’t tell me you’ve been sneaking out every night like this…?

Haha, I can never say no to my ramen cravings. What would you like, Chihiro?

Hmm, I’ll have regular ramen, go light on the noodles!

I’ll have the deluxe large ramen, with all the toppings. And I’ll get a second serving later.

You got it!

You eat soooo much, Raitin! You even eat more than Tao!

I’d like to thank you for choosing Wakayama. I get to have fun every night thanks to you. The ramen here is very unique, and each shop’s taste differs.

If Nayuuki finds out about that, he’s gonna get mad at you~

I asked Nayuki as well, but he turned me down immediately. So far, the only ones who have come with me are Kinari and the Chief. When I asked Kuguri, he looked at me with quite some scorn on his face.

You’re picking the wrooong place to invite Kugurin. You should change your strategy.

Hm, is that so… I’ll remember that.

Regardless, I’m glad you came, Chihiro. This makes us accomplices now.

Midnight ramen is definitely not good, but it’s so delicious… Ughh, I gotta work hard at training tomorrow…

Here you go, thanks for waiting!

Uwahh, it smells so good… The steam is warm.

This here is simmered pork with bones and uses soy sauce as a base, right? Yeah, it smells wonderful.

Yummy…

Going right to sleep after you eat isn’t a good idea, but you do become sleepier when your blood sugar rises. That’s not so bad every now and then, right?

(…! Did he notice how restless I was from not being able to sleep…)

(It’s yummy… It really is, but my head still feels all jumbled…)

≪What did I expect? Like father, like son. You can’t seem to fight that scum’s blood anyways. That means there’s no doubt you have that scum’s blood in you too–≫

(Hic)…

(Sniff)… This is really… good… (sniffle sniff)…

(Hic)… (sniff)…

Eating ramen always relaxes me.

(Sniff)…

(Raitin’s giving me headpats…)

You’re always doing your best. No matter what happens, you’re smiling and cheering us on. Particularly me, even when I botch my jobs.

Raitin…

I’m unfamiliar with things such as the subtleties of emotions, and Nayuki cursed at me thoroughly for it… But, well, I can at the very least lend an ear to your problems.

……!

It’ll be like a hole that shouts ‘Donkey Ears!’ But don’t worry, I won’t grow reeds on me.

Huh? Wait, what? I don’t get it at all!

Haha. I might be getting rusty, but I’m still the leader. Use me sometimes when it’s convenient.

……

My worries are all tangled up and messy right now…

Yeah.

My whole family was supposed to come the day after tomorrow, but my Big Sis and Mom ended up fighting… In the end, Mom will only be there on the day of the wedding photo.

I see… Do your sister and mother fight often?

Yeah… Crazy, isn’t it? They’ve always had a bad relationship. Before the wedding, I thought maybe they could get along a little better, so I came up with the idea for the wedding photos. Sorry for mixing up my personal feelings with work.

…I’ve managed many companies. Trying to work without putting any feeling into it doesn’t produce many results. I think it’s a good thing for you to put so much passion in your work, Chihiro.

I think the project itself can turn out well, but… Even if we’re smiling in the photos, I can’t help but think… that we’re not a happy family.

…I thought that if I tried hard, maybe things could change. That maybe, Mom could change too.

…How exactly did you want her to change?

…I dunno. I guess I wanted her to be like one of those expert mama pandas raising their kids here, or something like that…

(I think… I wanted mom to turn me into a pink panda…)

When I said it was to get her to come and improve Ev3ns’ image, she looked down on me, thinking I was just using family as bait for views.

……

In the end, things got more tense than before.

…So that’s what happened.

Chihiro, you… You love your sister and your mother, don’t you?

……

I’m an idiot, arent’t I? Even though my mom always says horrible things to me, I can’t bring myself to hate her.

Not at all… I think it’s proof of how loving you are. I’m also one of the people who has been saved by that grace of yours. You forgave me when I almost broke Ev3ns apart, after all.

Let’s see… I can’t think of a good way to cheer you up…

There’s an old saying that goes, “You can’t change the past, but you can change the future”. Have you heard of it?

…I don’t think so.

I see. I’ve been thinking of this phrase often lately. …Because I’m now witnessing the mistakes I’ve made in the past occur right in front of my eyes.

Past mistakes?

If I had to use an example closer to me, that would be Nayuki. After receiving my death prophecy, I lived as though I had abandoned my own self, ignoring Nayuki’s advice and concerns…

At some point back then, I completely broke Nayuki’s spirit. …I still remember that time clearly. It was right then and there that I had lost the right to be Nayuki’s older brother.

Really…?

I regret it, but I can’t change the past or other people. What I’ve done won’t go away, and it’d be selfish to ask Nayuki to change, yes? That’s why…

I will walk towards the future and change myself, never forgetting how I hurt Nayuki.

Is it… really okay to eat ramen at midnight?

Ahaha. Nayuki may get mad, but he’ll be okay with it, surprisingly.

Raitiiin…

Urk… Alright. I’ll make amends by pulling a double in my lesson time.

…But I see. So it means that there’s no way Chii can change Mom, huh…

…There may come a time when she’ll change. This may be frustrating, but perhaps all you can do is wait for that moment.

I’m sorry that’s all I can say to help you…

(Raitin’s genuinely trying to change… That’s why he’s really giving some thought about how I feel.)

(If only mom could care about us kids a little bit… But I can’t change the past.)

(I can’t change other people or the past, but… Even so, there’s still a part of me that wants to change it…)